.mid-surgery post.

Sayang. I was planning sana na every end of rotation ako gagawa ng bagong post para organized ang documentation ng aking clerkship, pero wala e. Lakas talaga ng hatak sa akin ng blog ko. :)

Anyway, classes are supended today because of the foul weather.. and ang saya-saya kasi kasali pa rin kami sa suspension! Nakakatawa nga e, kasi this is the second time in my less than 2 weeks in Surgery that classes were suspended on the day that I was supposed to go on duty sa ER. So yey!

It's not like I have anything against the PGH-ER. Well, definitely, it could use a lot of improvement. Not just with facilities and supplies, but even in the way the entire complex is run. Ewan ko. Wala lang. The first time I went on duty, sobrang na-miss ko ang OBAS. Hehe. I mean, sure, OBAS duties last 24 hours, while we were only required to stay in the ACU-ER from 6pm to 6am, but for some reason, I find myself more tired at the end of the day here. Tapos, wala pang post-duty status kasi hanggang 5pm ka pa kailangan mag-stay sa PGH kahit na technically off ka na. We have to be on-call for OR assists, patient orders, new admissions, rounds, and others. So uuwi ka siguro mga 5pm the next day, then go back again at 7am for a new day. Sabi nga ni Ate, para na daw pala akong sa PGH nakatira.

Hindi pa nga ako ulit nakakauwi sa amin e. I know it's only been a week, pero nakakamiss na rin talaga. There's no place like home, ika nga. And by home, that means both my home and my church. Wala lang.

Ayan. I just reread what I wrote and I realized na parang nagrereklamo pala ako no? I shouldn't be. Sabi nga ni Dr. Consunji na aming consultant monitor for Surg, wala daw kaming right na magcomplain hangga't vertical pa kami, caring for patients who are lying horizontal (okay, that sounds weird written down, but trust me, it made an impact on me when Dr. Consunji said it). We have to learn responsibility and accountability. He wants us to be so directly involved in the patient care that things wouldn't run as smoothly if we weren't around (although medyo idealistic siguro si Sir dun, so far paperwork talaga ang bulk ng role namin e). He also said that we have to keep an open mind when we rotate in the various departments. I guess I wasn't as enthusiastic about rotating in Surg because I had more or less already ruled it out as a possible specialty, but he encouraged us to still try and get the most out of these 4 weeks even if we had no intentions of going into it in the very near(!) future.

I spent the first week in Trauma division... and I just know Surgery is not for me. Hehe. I did enjoy it though. The residents, who appeared scary at first, turned out to be really cool and helpful after all. They also kept giving me procedures to do, which I acknowledge as the favor of God at work in my life. I'm just not really comfortable in the ER setting, where tension is thick and adrenaline runs high and everyone is in a rush to get things done because someone's life is hanging on it. Definitely not for me. And I claim God's strength, endurance, favor, mercy, compassion, joy, peace, gentleness, meekness, longsuffering, kindness, and LOVE for the rest of my days in Surg, and in PGH na din as a whole. Ehehe. ;)

One thing I liked about it though - I had some opportunity to talk with patients and their bantays and hear them out. I can especially remember one particular bantay I accompanied to the cashier to pay for their labs. She came all the way from Bulacan to bring her nephew who was involved in a terrible vehicular crash and was gravely injured. As we were walking, we talked about the patient, their financial state, how she felt at that moment, stuff like that. I told her to never lose hope and just keep on praying to God. She was near tears as she was talking, and my heart was moved with compassion for their family. When the patient was finally admitted to the ward, I made it a point to drop by and check in on them every so often.

The patients help me see that I am blessed to be a blessing. They show me that I can actually make a world of a difference, not just medically speaking, but even by just simply showing them that they matter. That they deserve more than just a moment of my time, and that they are entitled to receiving the help that they need. I try to make it a point to talk to patients when they ask me something (although minsan talaga lumalabas ang "Itanong niyo na lang po kasi dun sa nurse" sa kin). hehe. Ewan ko. Wala lang. I'm really consciously trying to practice compassion, kahit na effort talaga minsan. That's the kind of doctor I want to be e.

Ay nako. Ano na namang drama ito? Hehe. Wala lang. Pero fun din naman talaga. You can enjoy anything naman if you choose to e! Kaya praise God for my blockmates, my servicemates, the comfy callroom, the mess hall, and for every good and perfect gift that comes from above! Hahaha! ;)

Gusto ko lang sana talaga ng post-duty privileges. Hahaha! ;)