.an extra-long post-Valentine 2008 post.

Every little girl, at any time during her childhood, dreams of becoming a princess.

Walt Disney has managed to romanticize this concept so well that, at some point, we've all had our moments of standing in front of a mirror, a tinfoil crown on our heads and a makeshift scepter in hand, and practicing our royal strut. We've envisioned living in a magical palace filled with talking furniture and roomfuls of our favorite things. We secretly talk to our fairy godmothers and thank them for the heavenly gowns they fashioned for us to wear. We look out through windows with a dreamy look on our faces and imagine what worlds lie beyond what the eyes can see. Yes. We've definitely gotten the royal act down pat.

But let us not forget our favorite (admit it) part.

Prince Charming.

No matter what age, girls' dreams always include that dashing young prince who strides in on his royal steed. He is handsome, confident, and brave - he single-handedly slays the ferocious dragons with just a swing of his sword (which glistens in the sunlight, by the way), battles an entire battalion of armed villains and emerges wounded but victorious, and most importantly, rescues the damsel in distress from the wicked, wicked stepmother. A single kiss is enough to destroy the most powerful curse bestowed on the princess by an evil sorcerer. It all ends the same though. The lovely princess and the chivalrous prince ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after.

We so long for this fairy tale to be true. But the fact that no one really actually sings their thoughts out loud in public should have already given us a hint that while these stories send us off to la-la-land with a smile on our young faces, they do not portray life as it really is.

Puberty strikes. Reality sets in. In pursuit of her childhood fantasies, princess latches on to the first princely guy she meets and discovers that her handsome prince has turned into a toad. She then gets disillusioned, breaks things up, and continues the pursuit to find her "real prince"... who may be just somewhere out there. In the process, princess ends up kissing a lot of frogs - and not one of them turns out to be a prince. They are just that - frogs. Croak.

Let me just say that I do not claim to be an expert on relationships. Far from it. As we go along, I am still learning much. And the more I learn, the more I discover that I still have even MORE to learn.

The truth is this: That while life is definitely no fairy tale, the promise of true love holds much more beauty and happiness than we can ever fathom.

Things have not changed. I still do not believe in shallow, fleeting relationships that seek only to satisfy one's own lust and wants. To enter into a relationship thinking only of what you can get from the other is a recipe for disaster. I do not believe in going out on dates after dates with different and random people just so you can find "the one." I cringe at casual flings that leave you wondering and confused about where you truly stand with the other person (though I may have been guilty of this in the past too). It is much better to be single and maximize your potentials that way, than be attached and find your security solely in that pseudo-relationship.

But I do believe in growing and maturing in love, in walking side by side and moving towards the same vision. I believe in making a lifetime commitment to make the decision to love that person that God has enriched your life with. In short, I believe in marriage - a sacred covenant between a strong man and a strong woman established before the very presence of God - and then continuing on in that covenant for years and years to come, through anything and everything. I've always been a big fan of couples who grow old together, with wrinkled faces and hair streaked with gray, eyes shining with the same love as they had on their wedding day. I feel more "kilig" at seeing an old couple slowly dancing to their song on their fiftieth anniversary than at a teenybopper movie of two kids rebelling against their parents as they dramatically "fight for their love".

Before you deduce anything else from this, I am not getting married. Yet. Who knows when that day will be? Just as I do not have to be dog to be able to understand how a dog functions, I do not have to be married yet just to know how it goes. My best friend Holy Spirit helps me out a lot. Think about it. The most profound and practical lessons on marriage in the Bible come from Paul - who was never married at all. But I do desire it, and I sincerely believe that we are moving towards that. ;) We are not in a rush, though.

One of the best life lessons I have learned is to BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND. If you are currently involved in something (or someone) that is going nowhere fast, get out! Plans fail and people perish for lack of vision. If at the onset, you do not know where you want to end up, you are definitely merely setting yourself up for chaos and failure. This is one of the things I am still working out in my life.

Everyday, Lopao and I work out this relationship we have and revel in the joy that we derive from it as we go along. We think long-term while learning to enjoy each day as it comes. Equipped with the knowledge that we are both complete individuals in Christ, we encourage each other to go out, grow, and discover more about ourselves as we continually pursue God's purpose for each of our lives. We make plans together, and yet we also dream our own dreams without fear.

Ours is not a perfect relationship. I will not be arrogant enought to say that. Four months young, we still have a long way to go. There are still tons to discover about each other. Even now, differences are evident between us. You don't believe me? Let me elucidate. Lopao is an achiever and a leader, an outstanding young man who has a gazillion extra-curricular activites lined up most of the time. I, on the other hand, prefer to go straight home after school and enjoy the rest that entails. He is the class president; I am an obscure face in a sea of many who gets a kick out of observing how people behave. He eloquently speaks out whatever he thinks and feels; I need prodding and questioning to even get out one sentence of a personal nature. He thrives on serious conversations and intellectual exchanges; I start to crack jokes when I sense the beginning of what might transform into an uncomfortable talk. He reads Neil Gaiman; I read Nicholas Sparks. He can rattle off the pathophysiology of certain diseases, while I struggle to piece together the information that I gather. He likes movies such as "The Mummy", "Blood Diamond", or "The Godfather"; I sleep through them. He shines in the presence of authorities - consultants, administrators, presidents, you name it. I clam up in their midst. He wants to change the entire health system of the country; I want to touch lives on a more intimate basis, even if it means helping one person at a time.

Yet, we click. And I know why. Because in the things that truly matter, we are in agreement. Lops and I have been friends long before we got into this, and we have had no trouble adjusting to the change. We acknowledge God as the center of our relationship. We trust in His Word and find that it holds the answer to any situation that may arise. We give importance to our families and treat them with the love that they are due. We value trust, loyalty, and sincerity in the friendships that we establish. We see the significance of having fun together. We support each other and encourage each other to go further than where we are at present. We constantly affirm each other in what we do and also gently nudge each other when we may be doing something wrong. We look at the field of medicine and we see service to the people, though we may show it in different ways. We believe in the Philippines and the glorious future in store for the Filipinos. We look out for each other. We give to each other without asking for anything in return - and yet somehow, something always returns, because we both love to give.

This may be an overindulgence, but stay with me. This is the first time I have written about us and it feels so liberating. I am not trying to sensationalize things, or make things appear better than they actually are. Lopao is not perfect and neither am I. We both have moments that we are not particularly proud of - but we are both working towards perfection as we are both continually trained in the Word of God. With God on our side, who can be against us?

My life is not a fairy tale. I have never met Prince Charming and I probably never will. But who cares?

I've got my Homi.

I love you dear.

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Glory to God for all the good and perfect things that have happened, are happening, and will happen in the future.

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Ate Kat, this is my February 14 post.